Parenting Tip #1 Listening without Reacting

As a therapist for the last 20 years working with children, teens & families, I often get asked for help managing a child's acting out, essentially what parenting tip do you have for me.  I remember when my friends started having kids & they would ask what I thought was the best parenting tip.  I always say, "Listen without Reacting".  It's a trait my mother often displayed when I was growing.  I am naturally curious about people & their stories.  I often asked my mom questions to the point that I was obnoxious & intrusive, yet she never reacted.  She indulged embarrassing questions I would ask about her relationship with my father (in front of my friends no less).  She worked really hard at answering my questions in an age appropriate yet honest response. It stuck with me & is something I use as a therapist & stepmom. It is important to help our kids feel that they can trust us.  Listening without Reacting may seem challenging but in the long run helps build trust & let's our kids know we are listening to them.